Question 4. Talk to him about it, but stay calm. However, as angry as you might be, try to keep things civil. If you just found out about what happened, give yourself a little time to cool off before you try to talk to him. We need to talk about this. You can also excuse yourself for a few minutes or as long as you need to calm down. Listen to what he has to say. Discuss what you want to happen next. It may take some time and lots of discussion between the two of you to figure things out.
Question 5. It could reflect an underlying problem in the relationship. If your husband is actually texting inappropriately with another woman, it could be for any one, or a combination of, the following reasons: [19] X Research source He feels a lack of connection, love, or balance in the marriage. He has issues with sexual addiction. Question 6. It can be. Texting makes it easy to communicate with other people quickly and privately, anytime and anywhere. Talk to your husband about how you both define cheating.
Identifying cheating in a marriage can be tricky, because not everyone defines it the same way. Your husband might consider sending a flirtatious text to be no big deal, while you might see it as crossing the line. Question 7. You could use a phone spy app. Just be aware that snooping could be very damaging. Otherwise, you could seriously undermine your relationship by introducing a lot of new trust issues into the mix.
Otherwise, try to use it only as a last resort. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Related wikiHows How to. How to. I have also repeatedly asked for this behavior to stop. He lies and tells me they no longer text, until he gets caught red-handed again. We have been seeing a marriage counselor regarding this and other issues.
He has lied to the counselor about his texting relationship with his colleague. He tells me I am overreacting and that I should get over it. What do you suggest? But what my suggestion might do is help you see another way to move through this impasse and understand it better before you make any decisions about your marriage. However, if he is texting with her more than he is texting with you, this could be a little bit of a red flag.
Why does he need to speak to her constantly? If he is just speaking to one of his friends, then you might question why he is being so secretive about it.
It is completely valid for you to feel concerned if he is lying about speaking to her because if he just saw their relationship as platonic, he would be honest. Work can also take over our personal lives, especially if your husband has a high up position, needs to be on call all the time or has his own business. One of the people that he might need to be in touch with at work could be a woman. He will also probably understand when his work life is crossing over into his personal life with you and will manage it properly.
There is no problem with this, as long as the relationship between him and the other woman stays strictly business. Unfortunately, if it does turn into something more it might be difficult for you to find out, especially if he has a work cell phone.
Your husband might just be responding to a woman that is constantly texting him. He could be completely innocent in the act of speaking to another woman.
Even if she is trying to pursue him, he might not realize. He might hide these texts from you if he is worried that you will think something is going on, but normally in this kind of situation, your husband will be open with you because he thinks nothing of it. Of course, as women, we understand other women and we can tell when someone is coming on to our partners. If your husband is spending a lot longer on his phone than usual, it could be because another woman is occupying his mind and his time.
This could be happening with a friend who has transitioned into more than just that, or he could have met someone new. Whatever the circumstances, he will spend a lot more time texting now he is interested in someone else. The difficult thing to comprehend in this situation is that he could be having an emotional affair without even realizing he is doing it.
A lot of the time, we only think of cheating as physical and sexual activity, but it is so much more than that. An emotional affair can hurt more than if your husband went and had a one-night stand because the difference is that his emotions are well and truly involved with someone else. This is a really painful thing to come to terms with. Some of the other ways you might be able to tell that your husband is having an affair in relation to texting are:. None of these signs would be true if he was just speaking to a female friend, because he would have nothing to hide.
What you should do really depends on which of the situations you think your husband is in from the ones I have mentioned above. Therefore, I urge you to really think about the specific situation you find him in and then act accordingly to it. We will look later on at how to act concerning specific situations, but the first thing you should do, which is essential to whatever situation you are in, is to talk to him. Communication is such a crucial part of a marriage, and it can really make or break it.
As women, we sometimes presume that men are the same as us in many ways, but they are not. They are not going to read our minds or understand the situation until we spell it out for them.
Also, women can be quick to jump to conclusions, especially when it comes to the men in our lives and their unfaithfulness. This is especially true if you have been cheated on before or have had difficult relationships in the past. No one reacts positively or honestly when they have already been accused of something without the opportunity to defend themselves. If you have any problems with another woman and your man speaking to each other, you can simply tell him how it makes you feel.
He might not have even realized it was affecting you, and he might stop texting her as much. People only tell the truth when they feel comfortable, so make him feel comfortable and speak to him from the heart. Firstly, if they are simply just friends then he will probably open with you about them speaking with each other.
0コメント